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We compromised on the kids: We attend church, but only occasionally, and the kids get the basics of Catholicism specifically and Christianity in general.

They are free to stop going when they’re 13 (after they’re confirmed).

Everything was great until politics began to creep in and the church began hosting speakers like Jerry Falwell, the ultraconservative pastor and political pundit.

, then open a dialog with him seeking to understand his belief systems and how he arrived there. when you care deeply about the person you're talking to, the feelings behind the ideas take a bit of time (long seconds and long minutes) to formulate into intelligible words and sentences.8) If either of you get testy apologize immediately and take a break because nerves are on edge.

I would also note that this could be a very easy, fun discussion, or it could be a horrendously difficult and painful one depending entirely on how you and he approach it. 5) When they are speaking, listen to understand, not to form a response. This can be really scary stuff to explore with a stranger, much more with someone you care about.9) Good luck.

I've had these discussions before, and enjoy them a lot if, and only if, both folks approach it as a lighthearted exploration of why the other believes the way they do... If you pull this off your turn will come in due time (and the same ground rules apply).7) Be patient, don't "respond" If they fall silent for a bit...

Here's what works for me: Rules:1) Your purpose it to find out and explore what the other person believes and why.2) No proselytizing at all, even by implication.3) You are only seeking information about what and why they believe as they do.4) If the words "But" or "Yes But", or anything even vaguely resembling it, starts your next sentence..

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